Video will appear as you scroll through the story
Lily Allen · S8 E3
The Assault
What happened after the BRIT Awards — and who knew
In My Thoughts Exactly, Lily Allen describes a scene she has never shared publicly before. A music industry figure sexually assaults her, and when she tells people what happened, she is advised to keep quiet.
"Never Gonna Happen" by Lily Allen, live in Croatia (2009). The title takes on a different weight in the context of this episode. Justice for what happened was never gonna happen. Accountability from the industry was never gonna happen. And staying quiet about it forever was, eventually, also never gonna happen.
The Chapter
In one of the memoir's most explosive sections, Lily Allen describes being sexually assaulted by a music industry figure. She writes about the incident in unflinching detail, describing both the assault itself and the suffocating silence that followed. What the industry did afterwards, she argues, was almost as damaging as the act itself.
TAP TO REVEAL: What happened when Lily tried to tell people in the industry?
Never Gonna Happen, Lily Allen (2009)
'Never Gonna Happen' is built on an upbeat, striding beat with Kurstin's characteristic warmth, while the lyric is about setting boundaries and refusing to accept what shouldn't be happening. Listen for the steel in Lily's vocal on the chorus: she sounds like someone drawing a line in the ground. The production makes you want to nod along, but the words are deadly serious. After reading My Thoughts Exactly, this song about refusal takes on an entirely different meaning.
The Silence
For years, Lily Allen carries the story without telling it publicly. She alludes to it in interviews, hints at it in lyrics, and processes it in therapy. The full account only becomes possible when the #MeToo movement creates a space where women's stories are believed, and when Lily decides the career she was told she'd lose matters less than the truth.
The Assault Chapter
Praying, Kesha
Kesha's 'Praying' was written after years of legal battles against a producer she accused of assault. The song is about finding the strength to survive what was done to you, and hoping the person who did it eventually has to face themselves. In an episode about Lily Allen's own account of assault, Kesha's voice carries the weight of someone who knows exactly what that silence costs.
Praying, Kesha (2017)
Kesha wrote these words after her own assault and legal battle. The connection to Lily Allen's memoir chapter is direct: two women, two industries, the same silence broken.
What cultural movement created the conditions for Lily Allen to finally publish her assault account?
The police failed her, the label failed her, and the industry closed ranks. Next episode: Lily Allen maps out exactly how every system that was supposed to protect women let her down.
0 XP earned this session